The Makeup Rocks…

What is it about Oceans 8? The ladies? The Met Gala? The cameos? Aside from a couple Kardashians, the cameos are quite fetching. Miss Wintour appears to be working on her rep since Devil Wears Prada, does she not? Could it be the teaser that one of the beloved boys is dead? Yeah, that happens. What trumps it all, my dolls, is the makeup. No lie.

Believe it or not, it’s not the skin of twenty-somethings that shines. For once, the “older” set steals the show. Sandra Bullock, 53, Cate Blanchett, 49, Helena Bonham Carter, 52, Sarah Paulson 43, all considered “up there” by Hollywood standards, slap the shit out of that outdated belief with a flawless glow rarely seen in those of us of a certain age. This chick’s mouth? Agape. Stayed through the credits to check up on the makeup goddess.

The younger set looks good. Of course they do. We all did. Anne Hathaway, Rhianna, Mindy Kaling and Awkwafina are in their thirties. Girls, you ought to look good. Life hasn’t kicked the shit out of you yet. And Dakota Fanning is still a baby so there’s that.

Turns out the makeup queen is Louise McCarthy. Bow down ladies. McCarthy says the key is HD Light Proof Makeup consisting of primer, ultra HD powder and a good foundation between. She recommends Chanel La Teint. Tried it when it was all the rage. Meh. For sixty bucks–think hard about that one. She does, however, spill the beans on go-to primer and HD powder. It’s Benefit POREfessional Face Primer. At $31, give this one a try. Spending the weekend with Middle Chicken. Perhaps face slathering should be added to the activity list.

As for setting powder, the bane of any over-thirty face, McCarthy touts Make Up Forever’s Ultra HD Loose Powder. It will set you back $36 but if it wrestles pores and creates a flawless finish, the 36 will be well spent, non? If not, it’ll get passed to Baby Chicken. They all look fab on her flawless face, due less to product and more to the fact that she’s 24. Pfft.

For those of us who spackle on the daily, this is good news. Not only do we spy what can be done with a face over fifty, but it gives the rest of the world a big F-off that beauty is exclusive to the young and unwrinkled. Even if we give heed to the probability of fillers, one still has to create the palette. All the Botox in the world can’t fix tone and finish. That is the point after all, non? Create a face just a bit better than what we’ve got. Highlight the good. Downplay the not so great. Unless you don’t buy into any of it. Good for you. I admire your security, if not your eyelashes.

So if it takes a little HD light diffusion to fool those we encounter as well as ourselves–what’s the harm? It’s not like a guy’s never stuffed a sausage down his pants.

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