Who Are Your 5?

8:43 PM… Twenty-two days until Amour turns to Duchess Diaries…

We talk support–supportive measures, supportive people, supportive work places. What does that really mean? According to The Fixer, support comes in fives. That is to say, The Plus Five Effect which some kickass chicks and one guy discuss at our gathering a few days ago.

Before we arrive at the five, we explore sisterhood. Our guy proves a good sport; offering a male viewpoint when one is requested. Otherwise he keeps pretty quiet, as every wise man should when the room is filled with chicks with opinions. We’ve lost it. Sisterhood, that is. It demands reclamation. The Fixer contrasts European traditions of community–watching children, supporting other families within the village, sharing meals and bolstering each other.

“We need to share our wisdom with each other. It does no good to keep it to ourselves,” she stresses. “Stop gossiping. Right now. We need to talk to each other not about each other.” Of course, our guy is a bit lost. He does that thing guys do in business: remember it’s business, nothing personal. Gossip plays no part in the bro code.

She points out women have created a pastime of getting together and instead of communicating, we commiserate. We get together and complain. “We need to stop dumping on unsuspecting people.” And allowing others to do the same. “People who take their trash out on you aren’t looking for solutions.” Clear boundaries are vitally important. Set yours wisely. Rid yourself of any bitch not clearly on your side doll.

Which brings us to our “five.” You can’t forget it. It’s five, like when you hold up your hand. Do you have five people in your life who have your back? Do you have five people who will help you through thick and thin? You recognize them by their traits.

They believe in you.

They will share with you their skills.

They want you to succeed.

They are your trusted advisors.

They create your six degrees of separation.

Why? Because they support you enough to pass on your fabulousness to their five and those pass to their five and so on and so on and so on. Pretty soon your network is larger than even you know. Clients materialize. Supporters surround you. Success is there for the taking.

Who are your five, girlfriend? More importantly, are you a supportive five to others? Turns out, that circle of life thing is more than just a song in The Lion King.