Excuse Me, You Know Who?…

We’re talking motivational speakers. Someone referred to Advisor Girl as such. She’s not taking it well.

“They are dopers,” she says flatly.

I laugh. “It’s true,” she sniffs. She does indignation almost as well as I do.

Why? I wonder.

“There are studies to support it,” she begins. She explains that in motivational speaking situations, the human brain shows a marked increase in serotonin; our basic amped-up feeling. Studies show that it holds for only a short time without action. After four hours, there’s a decline and after a few days, there is no lingering effect.

“It doesn’t last. People need more and more of the pumping up.” Her accent is akin to Hans and Franz of SNL fame, “We vant to pump you up.” She’s not laughing.

“There is no action associated with it so people become codependent. They can’t keep it up all on their own. They face that reality and then there is depression.” Taken advantage of, she pffts. In all my days enjoying all manner of rah-rah sessions, I never realized I was subject to rising and falling serotonin levels. She says the key is putting the words to work to action.

Then she drops a bomb, casually mentioning that if you want to work with someone truly motivational, it should be someone who brings something to the table like Richard. “Richard Branson, you know him? He actually believes in true service for true reward and walks the walk.”

“He greatly rewards those around him. He has infectious bravery and he expects that from those he works with.”

The mind reels. Wait, I say. “Back up. You know Richard Branson?”

“Yes,” she answers, calm as if acknowledging Kate of Cornwall is her bestie. I sit stunned. Inside I’m thinking: “Who the hell is sitting in my living room? WTF? Richard? Your pal? Who are you?”

She weaves the story of a group of twenty that meet with him on the island (but, of course) where they ponder and conjur the next best businesses. Basically, they sit around and imagine companies and he puts those imaginings into play.

“He looks for new things. He’s a money maker and that’s excellent.” I would guess so.

She notes my surprise and adds, “Oh he’s lots of fun. He’s humorous. You would like him a lot.” Um, duh. We talk a bit more and she flits to her next client.

It’s been a long day. I’ve only one thing to say. Advisor Girl (and evidently Richard Branson) 1, Motivational Speaker 0.