I don’t believe in Casual Friday; not as a concept and not as a participant. One should always look their best at work. We never know when there will be the need to intimidate someone or point out that their sweater is not merely blue but cerulean and that fashion does, in fact, affect us all. Can you say Miranda Priestly?
Last Friday, due to peer pressure and a comment that I may not be as participatory as I should be, I gave in. I admit to weakness and after a pressure-filled week, I was tired at 6 a.m. and I do have a delicious new brand of jeans that actually fit and stretch in all the right places. That only took manufacturers what, a hundred years. About time.
So I gave in. It was a first and a last to be sure. Jeans that stretch, a black turtleneck ala Tahari, black suede boots, and a feeling of naughtiness join me on the drive to work. The receptionist did a double-take upon my arrival and I felt the need to explain. Not sure why but I blurt, “I’ll only be here for a bit.” A lie.
Scurry to my office and the chair doesn’t feel quite right. It’s because, in jeans, one doesn’t sit quite as straight, move with the grace that comes only with a heeled proper work shoe, or command the room in the way high waisted, wide-legged trousers or the perfect skirt demand. I fight the urge to go home and change. I certainly will not be entering the Board Room today. It would be blasphemous.
On the way to the restroom, I encounter colleagues who look at me quizzically. Perhaps they do not recognize me out of uniform. Perhaps they mistake me for an intruder. Perhaps they are silently commenting on my slovenliness. Perhaps they are talking as I walk away.
“Do you think she’s alright?”
“Has she given up on life completely or just having a bad day?”
“Should we call someone? Does anyone know her emergency contact?”
Don’t worry, ladies, I feel your concern and ask myself the same.
“Have I lost all sense of decorum?”
“Have I become lazy?”
“Why on earth would you wear an outfit more suited to a casual dinner or fall lunch to work? Have you no pride?”
The shame only deepens as hours creep by. So bereft am I, I consult google for the reasons behind Casual Friday. Until now, I’ve no reason to care. Evidently, it is meant for team building and bonding, fun, and a reward for a productive week. I call fail on all counts.
I am certainly not building teams or bonding due to underdress and sloven. I am not having fun and my productivity should only be rewarded with cold hard cash to buy more appropriate work clothing, not showing up to work in my “grubbies.”
The interminably long day does come to an end. I meet the girls for happy hour and they say, “You look so cute.”
Don’t get me started.
The Duchess Diaries 