While those of us in The Dale continue to sit upon the sun’s surface, the fashion world turns to Fall and all its heavenly offerings. Never one to tell others what to wear, except in the case of you sloppy ones–don’t do that. Just don’t. It seeps into every aspect of your image.
One imagines you are bad at your job, not very bright, and perhaps unkind to animals if you cannot manage to keep clean, well-coifed, and dressed. And there are exciting directions for this Fall. The past few years have been a bit lackluster. This fall promises to return us to the halcyon days of feminine Sixties–think Joan in Mad Men. Yes…with the pearls. Bow down to the fashion goddesses my loves. Pearls strutted on the runways of Milan, Paris, and on the lips of the fashion-forward everywhere.
And why not? Ever chic. Flattering to every facial tone and so very versatile, who can possibly argue? Wear your precious orbs long, perhaps knotted–oh you minxy thing –or closer to the neck in odd number strands. Most are showing a single strand but where’s the fun in that?
Pointy toe pumps are back. Is that applause? This girl just added a burgundy pair with a double strap accenting the toe. I know, squee right? And, yes, burgundy is the leather neutral of the Fall. Matches everything, can be dressed up or down, and brightens up our favorite black. What could be more yummy?
What’s even more fun than a pointy toe pump? One that comes in animal print. Meow. The over-long hiatus is over–leopard is back baby. Are you dancing? It’s de rigueur on Mary Janes and ballet flats and takes the pump from love, love, love to ooh la la.
Lots of suede barn coats. Pass. I don’t go out to collect the eggs and neither should you. Not that collecting the eggs is bad, just don’t look like someone’s frumpy gramma while you stuff your pockets. Also a no–barely there silk and lace dresses. In winter? Not even in The Dale where winter lasts a day and a half. Unless you’re twenty minus a single derriere dimple; don’t do it. These skirts tell on everyone. If you must follow the trend, buy it cheap–Amazon’s got a bunch—and pair it with something slouchy. Ugh.
Summer found us flouncing in full skirts and that looks to continue. You can hide all manner of secrets under those skirts–too much ice cream? Who cares? No one can tell. It’s tucked under the flounce. However, there is a healthy dose of pencil skirts. Pair with a silky blouse, some pearls and release that inner sixties goddess.
Wide-leg trousers remain in the mix. Lucky us, not stuffed sausage-like in skin-tight jeans. Feminine, curvy, tailored tweeds and wools have us positively giddy. Stock up now girls on those short tweedy jackets that remind us of a certain girl called Coco. And what could compliment it better than a flowy white bow blouse and you guessed it, pearls. Again, you can go with the one strand that’s on the runways or drape yourself in deliciousness and intimidate everyone in the boardroom.
When someone says you’re too dressed up, stare at them until they walk away. Grasp your burgundy handbag and go have a dirty martini–another one that will never go out of style. Love ya Dolls!
The Duchess Diaries 